I am Shiva


A child is a very special thing for couples all around the world. It somehow signifies or rather solidifies their union. It is scientifically and socially a mark of their union. But, there a few less fortunate who cannot conceive so easily. When, they do not, they turn to all doors that can get them a child (mostly THEIR child). These doors can be many, i.e., of science, occult science, certain homemade remedies or the doors of the Supreme Being.

Of all these, I believe the last option is somewhat more tried and tested, monetarily beneficial (rather profitable, I must say) and has a higher success rate (according to my late grandmother) than the others. In spite of the harsh tone in the previous sentence, I do believe praying is a manner of strengthening one’s positive beliefs, and while asking for a child from a God, I understand that a couple, somewhere deep down try to strengthen their own beliefs of being able to reproduce.

Of the thousands of couples who have asked for a boon child, I surely know one rather closely. In fact they happen to be my parents (did I say, I Love You?); and their boon child is Me (see I am a boon after all).

The God who they asked the child; i.e. me; from is the Lord Shiva. The manifestation of the Supreme Being is divided in to three forms, according to the Hindu mythology; viz; Brahma the creator, Vishnu the preserver & Shiva the destroyer. Even though touted as the destroyer, he is according to me more of a transformer or a facilitator; who helps beings transform from one life to another, to facilitate rebirths and attain Moksha. Shaivites around the world believe that He performs all the three important actions and hence, Brahma & Vishnu are both forms of Shiva only.

Just being a boon child is not special, but my doting mother considers me special because when I was born, I had my hair tied in a knot as his hair-locks are generally represented. Moreover, I had a red colored trident made on my forehead and the lid of my right eye. As, the trident is also the representation of Shiva, my parents’ belief of me being born out of his blessing has strengthened over the years.

For me, it doesn’t really matter, if I was born out of a boon or not. It doesn’t matter if I was born with such symbols on my body or not. For me, he is more than just a God. More than just a man. He is a persona, who is so complete that I want to be him (remember not Him).

His is an intriguing personality. He has the killer looks. I mean look at the abs he has. Look at his muscular body. He for once, can make the hottest girls drool over him. But, for him it doesn’t even matter. He has outgrown his hunger such that, he has no desires, hence is free, hence has no karmic debts, hence is happy being himself.

According to lore, his tied hair represent the desires he has tied and kept. This somewhat symbolizes that how his desires are under his control, rather than vice versa; which is so true for all of us.

This outgrown hunger, happiness in his yoga, the inner eye (also known as the third eye), which provides one the perspective to look at one’s soul, makes him Shiva the hermit. He who adorns the lion and tiger skin. He whose hair is matted. He whose body is smeared in ash. He who is alone, yet happy. He whose drug is not narcotics but his yoga.

Sati was his first consort. She is the one, who turns the hermit into the benevolent Shankara, the householder. Theirs was a love which had passion, respect and purity of the utmost level. if it was not so, Sati would have not given her life, because she felt that her husband; Shiva; had been insulted by her father; Daksha Prajapati; on her account. Her giving up her own life, had turned Shankara to Bhairava, the destroyer. It is said that upon learning of his beloved’s death, Shiva went into a fit of rage. He created two creatures to destroy all who were responsible of his wife’s death. He himself opened his third eye, and performed the dreaded dance; the Tandava. Such was his love for Sati, that he is said to have carried her body on his shoulders and mourned her throughout the world. He had then believed that he would never love again. But, fate had other plans. Sati was reincarnated as Parvati, and again became his consort. Somehow, I feel Shiva tells us that ‘Love can happen twice’.

Out of all the Gods, I believe he is the only one to give his consort an equal status, hence the Ardhnareshwar form of his. He respects his woman, loves her passionately and hurts anyone who dares hurt her. Tell me, which woman doesn’t want a man such as him. Potentially, I think all these endearing qualities of his combined with the sixteen love-charms, may have lead Hindus to follow the Solah Somvaar Vrat for an ideal husband.

He is quick to temper, quick to pacify. He is easy to please. He expects no luxury or grandeur. Just a utensil full of water with good intentions are enough for him.

But, I as a human, when I introspect am anything but Him. although born with the hair-locks, I fail to control my desires. Although the trident was present on the place for the inner eye, I fail to regularly look within my soul. As, I believe that His trident represents the balance between the past, present and future; I absolutely fail to achieve this balance.

I do share his qualities of a passion for dance; he is after all the Nataraj. I too am quick to temper, and somewhat easily pacified. Even I can overlook grandeur, if I find the right intentions. I am; as children born by his grace are; passionate in all I want to do.

But, can I be the man who can give his consort an equal status? Or am I prejudiced with the infamous male ego?

Can I be a man, who can achieve a balance between the hermit and a householder? Or will I always be entangled in the cycle of karma?

Can I develop yoga as my narcotic? Or will I develop an addiction for wrath, avarice, sloth, pride, lust, envy, and gluttony?

So now I know that just being born of his boon isn’t enough. That necessarily doesn’t give me his qualities, at least not the ones that needs to be worked upon. I now know that he has always been there as a guiding angel for me (believe me guys, my experiences of him are more than natural); just to make me understand that I can be a bit more.

I think he tells me, us all in fact, that all the efforts we put in doing all wrong; if put in the right direction; someday that will lead us to telling, ‘I am Shiva’.


I am passionate about writing, but more so related to the man/ God we spoke about in this blog. My unchecked passion, might have carried me a bit too far to slightly affect your sentiments. But, this topic should not be taken religiously, because these are just my individual views about an individual I adore. And, after all, whatever I write necessarily may not be The Truth. I humbly have written this blog with my strong belief that:

Within infinite myths, lies the Eternal Truth.

Who sees it all?

Varuna, who has but a thousand eyes.

Indra, a hundred.


p style=”text-align:center;”>And I, only two. 


2 thoughts on “I am Shiva

  1. Brother, I was looking for an interesting article pertaining to the different analyses of Lord Shiva, and I simply enjoyed your post. Particularly because the same thoughts about his persona resounds in my imagination of him. I too feel the burning urge to be like him. A very enjoyable read. Hope to come across more ones such as this.


  2. Hi Mrityunjoy, thank you for the appreciation. I’ll soon be posting an article related to Lord Shiva. You can however read my last post Gods, Numbers & Matchsticks Part 1 to get in the flow.
    Thanks again.


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